its 10+ pm.. and i need to do my work.. but i cant help but blog this entry after reading the entry from a friend's blog.
I'm upset.. i admit.. so upset that I teared. (ok im a crybaby k..and my face usually speaks of whats in my heart :X) I'm upset not because of the content. Neither is it because of what he speaks about what I believe in.. but it's just sth about his life that upsets me.. perhaps its his thoughts and his heart (i think) that affect me so much.. I cant explain what.. but I feel it, i try to rationalise it..
is the freedom that you are asking for a true freedom? why do you experience the sadness and emptyness that I find can be easily overcome? by posting that entry.. is that your way of saying you respect individualism when you attack others implicitly? by saying what you want, doing what you please, is that respect? is that what you call freedom?
you call me philosophical.. you may call me staunch.. whatever the case.. it is your life that Im interested in, it is your values that I'm truly concerned..this is what i believe in. LOVE. im not being noble, i just want to share a love that changes me totally.
I dont know why you are going round and round in a circle and commenting on everything that doesnt seem to go your way.. heck caring every other thing that you have the least interest in. have you ever truly care for a person without any returns? have you truly love..here im not talking about bgr. just friendship,kinship.. have you done what is best for others even at the expense of your own interest, self sacrifice. again... im not being noble. Im not talking about perfect love. Who doesnt desire to have one.. but why insist on love is for losers.. would you rather be a loser in exchange for love? i would...
It puzzles me why you would continue to live this way when it has shown once and again its going no where.. you get frustrated again and again.. why.. it upsets me even as a friend to see these struggles.. seeing what you deem wonderful for your life. is this the happiness you told me once u wanted?
have you finally realise what upsets me?or am i wrong about something's very wrong about your life value and perspective?I'm not a philosopher.. neither am I a judge... perhaps u'll say i'm being overly concerned, perhaps u'll say i have no rights.. fine.. but i still hope, and i pray... you'll take this seriously..
"The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of men who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities--his eternal power and divine nature--have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse. For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals and reptiles. Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator--who is forever praised. Amen. Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion. Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done. They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless. Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them." Rom 1:18-32 Yet...........
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son.This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil.Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God." " John 3:16-21 true isnt it..that men prefer darkness than light...? I admit.. im not the good,sweet girl you see next door.. simply I cant deny I'm utterly rotten inside, selfcentered and whatever you can think of...But TODAY I care as your friend, Because He cared for me.He cares for you.
Signing off...Tingyu^^
Just me
"Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint." Isa 40:30-31
